I recently joined the Inspiring Moms Network.  One of our first tasks was to come up with a word and focus for the year.  I struggled with this all month.  What word should I choose?  What theme do I want this year to have?  What do I want to teach my children this year through my words and actions?

We were given a worksheet to come up with our word that was provided by Christine Kane.  You can download your own copy for free here.  I worked through the questions and still struggled to come up with a word.  The word I had worked through was Enough.  I have a hard time being enough… I want to be more.  I want to be the perfect mom, perfect wife, perfect accountant, perfect scrapbooker… but, my best is enough and that is a lesson I need to work on.

I tossed “enough” around and decided against it.  I set the thought aside and figured it would come to me sooner or later.

I happened to be talking to a very very good friend of mine and he said something about how proud he was of me going back to school for my MBA while juggling a full-time job and twins at home.  I blew him off and shot down his compliment.

He responded to me, “What happened to you?  You used to have so much confidence and believed in yourself.”

I kinda stuttered and thought for a second.  What did happen to me?  I used to like what I saw in the mirror.  I used to look people in the eye and take on the world.  I used to believe in myself.

I had kids.  I haven’t lost the weight of being pregnant with twins.  I hate looking at myself in the mirror.  I hate what I see.  I feel like I have very few friends.  I have even less that I trust.

I am smart.  I am a successful accountant.  I am working on my MBA.  I have a wonderful husband, two beautiful kids.  I am a great scrapbooker and card maker.  I have a handful of great friends that I would trust my kids’ lives with.  I’m doing good.  There is no reason to be the way I am… I should be a confident about myself and my life.

I don’t want my kids to grow up without confidence, like I did.

So, my word for 2013…

 

Confidence

What’s yours?

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